“Fuzzy Kinda/Sorta”

There is a fascinating column in The NY Times of Nov. 2, 2013, by Steven Kurutz that sheds an entirely-new light on what I thought was merely a verbal tic:

http://www.nytimes.com/2014/11/02/opinion/sunday/the-kind-of-sort-of-era.html?module=Search&mabReward=relbias%3Ar%2C%7B%221%22%3A%22RI%3A8%22%7D&_r=0

He cites several researchers and analysts who call them adverbial downtoners, hedge-speak,de-precision devices and strategic softening.  Kinda and sorta create rhetorical wiggle room, he says.

Here I thought that they were relatively new.  But, no.  One really-early super-grammarian who railed against them was William Safire, late of The Times.  In 1995 he used the term in the headline above, which is why it’s in quotes.

Now it turns political, in that kinda and sorta “can also make for wishy-washy and obsequious speech that lacks clarity, confidence and authority.”

And so I go out on a limb, with something that I’ve noticed after living outside the NY metro area for 35 years: Only kidding.

People west of Philadelphia seem to use that phrase whenever they want to soften an otherwise strong, declarative and usually-negative statement.

You don’t look so good -- Only kidding.

That movie wasn’t so hot -- Only kidding.

I’ve never been a big fan of hers -- Only kidding.

Chicago didn’t deserve to win that game -- Only kidding.

“My people” –i.e., born-and-bred Tri-Staters—make statements and stick by them. 

“You don’t like it?!!  Fuhgeddaboudit!!”

No rhetorical wiggling.   No toning down.  No de-precisioning.  No strategic softening.  Make an emphatic statement.  Stick by it. 

It’s not “sorta warm” today.  It’s 79 degrees outside.  Period.